tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-188126962011-05-22T12:46:21.354-07:00Deacon Dr. Freshhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03957541832557299790noreply@blogger.comBlogger21100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18812696.post-1131574490098706432005-11-09T14:12:00.000-08:002008-12-09T12:25:23.091-08:00<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_4If9l8vHAzc/RryS4T3CDnI/AAAAAAAAAEg/TFyVfFaJwVI/s1600-h/Samuel_Johnson_by_Joshua_Reynolds.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5097110374377983602" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_4If9l8vHAzc/RryS4T3CDnI/AAAAAAAAAEg/TFyVfFaJwVI/s320/Samuel_Johnson_by_Joshua_Reynolds.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2606/1621/1600/Christmas%20Deacon.jpg"></a></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18812696-113157449009870643?l=deacondictionary.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Deacon Dr. Freshhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03957541832557299790noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18812696.post-1131574324169837042005-11-09T13:55:00.000-08:002007-08-10T20:21:27.306-07:00<strong>Hey Y'all!</strong><br /><br /><div align="justify">You been directed here because you don't have a clue what your humble <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)">Deacon's</span></strong> talkin' 'bout! Why don't you understand? Because you don't have the <strong><em><span style="COLOR: rgb(153,0,0)">schema</span> </em></strong>Jack! You can't understand the <span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)"><strong>Deacon's</strong></span> <strong><em><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,153,0)">rich ramblins</span></em></strong> without the correct <em><strong>lexicon</strong></em>. </div><br /><em><strong>So here's all you need to know:<br /></strong></em><br /><div align="justify"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204);font-size:130%;" >Deacon Dr. Fresh:</span></strong> Absolutely the <span style="COLOR: rgb(0,153,0)"><strong>lurchest</strong></span> <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">sumbitch</span></strong> wine-rapper to ever put electrons to screen! AKA "<strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)">The Deacon</span></strong>" or occasionally "<span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)"><strong>The Archdeacon</strong></span>" when he says something particularly <strong><em><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,153,0)">lurch</span></em></strong>!</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(204,0,0);font-size:130%;" >Cracker</span></strong>: Real bad. A <span style="COLOR: rgb(102,102,204)"><strong>mofo</strong></span> who don't know <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">Jack</span></strong> about <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(204,102,0)">jank</span></strong>.</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><strong><em><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,51,255);font-size:130%;" >Mofo</span></em></strong>: A <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">dumb-ass</span></strong> <span style="COLOR: rgb(153,153,0)"><strong>peckerwood</strong></span> <strong>cracker</strong>!</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-size:130%;"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,102)">Peckerwood</span></strong>:</span> Someone who lives in the bush with the woodpeckers. See "<strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">cracker</span></strong>".</div><div align="justify"><span style="COLOR: rgb(153,0,0)"><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">Merlot:</span> <em><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,51,51)">A wine imposter.</span></em> <span style="COLOR: rgb(153,51,0)">"Merjank"</span></strong> </span><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)">would be a better name.</span></div><div align="justify"><strong>Jank bucket:</strong> Lower than low.</div><div align="justify"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,153);font-size:130%;" >Monkey Water:</span></strong> Superfoul<span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(255,102,0)"> jank wine.</span></div><div align="justify"><span style="COLOR: rgb(255,102,0)"><strong><span style="font-size:130%;">Saltine:</span> </strong></span><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)">See <strong>"cracker" </strong></span></div><div align="justify"><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)"><strong><span style="color:#ff6666;"><span style="font-size:130%;">Boppin' in the Beater</span>:</span> What you're always wishin' you were doin' with that hot ho! </div></strong></span><div align="justify"><strong><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">Jank-monkey</span>:</span> </strong>A <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(255,153,102)">bag-scratch</span></strong> <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,51,255)">pork-rind</span></strong> <span style="COLOR: rgb(0,102,0)"><strong>bastard-water</strong></span> <span style="COLOR: rgb(153,102,51)"><strong>crackerjank <span style="COLOR: rgb(153,0,0);font-size:130%;" >mofo</span>.</strong></span></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><strong><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="COLOR: rgb(153,0,0)">Jack</span>:</span> </strong>What most <span style="COLOR: rgb(204,0,0)"><strong>sumbitch</strong></span> wine-writers don't know <span style="COLOR: rgb(204,0,0)"><strong>Jack</strong></span> about! </div><div align="justify"><strong><span style="color:#666600;">Rooster Juice:</span></strong> Exceptionally nasty Bag Scratch Wine<br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">Thrustio</span><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">: See </span></span><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">"Boppin' in the Beater"</span> </div><div align="justify"><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,51,255);font-size:130%;" ><strong>Bastard Water:</strong></span> Monkey water that's gone bad.<br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(51,51,0)">Clock Windin'</span>: Self handlin'<br /><span style="COLOR: rgb(204,0,0);font-size:130%;" >Skankosaurus: <span style="COLOR: rgb(153,51,0); FONT-STYLE: italic">A babe your your Mom and sister will hate, but your Dad and brother will love, i.e., Angelina Jolie, Pamela Anderson, Paris Hilton.</span></span><br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(102,102,0)">Crackerdine</span><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">: </span>A <span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">peckerwater </span><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(0,102,0)">bastard-rind</span> <span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)">jank-bucket</span>.<br /></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-size:130%;"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)">Lurch</span></strong>:</span> Hot, cool, buff, talented, etc. Examples: <strong>Billy Munnelly</strong>, <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,153,0)">Stratus Wines</span></strong>, <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(255,0,0)">Zoltan Szabo</span></strong>, <span style="COLOR: rgb(102,102,0)"><strong>Led Zeppelin</strong></span>, <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,51,255)">Radiohead</span></strong>, <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(153,0,0)">AC/DC</span></strong> and of course<span style="font-size:130%;"><em> </em></span><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)"><em><strong>The Deacon!</strong></em> <span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)">Note that</span> <span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204)">Lurch</span></strong> is the polar opposite of <span style="COLOR: rgb(102,102,0)"><strong>Jank</strong></span>.<br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(255,0,0)"><span style="font-size:130%;">Motherdine</span>: </span><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(153,153,0)">Crackerpecker </span>dogbreath swill<br /></span></span></div><div align="justify"><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,204,0);font-size:130%;" ><strong>Crackerwood:</strong></span> A <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(255,102,0)">peckerjank</span></strong> <span style="COLOR: rgb(0,102,0)"><strong>mofo</strong></span>.<br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(102,0,0)"><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,51,0)">Bagwash</span>: Wine that's so jank it's only good for killing scrotal infections</span><br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold;font-size:130%;" >Vumpio: See <span style="COLOR: rgb(153,51,0)">Thrustio</span></span><br /></div><div align="justify"><span style="font-size:130%;"><span style="COLOR: rgb(255,102,102)"><strong>Jank</strong></span>:</span> Decrepit, stupid, boring, Evil, and <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(255,102,0)">cracker</span></strong>. The worst of all is <span style="COLOR: rgb(255,102,0)"><strong>crackerjank</strong></span>. <em>Examples include:</em> <strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(153,51,0)">Merlot</span></strong>, <strong>Hitler,</strong> <span style="COLOR: rgb(255,0,0)"><span style="COLOR: rgb(0,0,0)">and</span> <span style="COLOR: rgb(204,153,51)"><strong>Bono.<br /><br /><br /></strong></span></span></div><div align="justify"><strong><em><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,102,102)"></span></em></strong></div><div align="justify"><strong><em><span style="COLOR: rgb(51,102,102)"></span></em></strong></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><em>Hope this helps you decipher my brilliant meanderings...<br /><br /><br /></em></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify"><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,0,204);font-size:130%;" >Deacon Dr. Fresh</span></strong></div><div align="justify"><em><strong><span style="COLOR: rgb(102,102,102)">The Samuel Johnson of the Sommeliers<br /><span style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; COLOR: rgb(0,153,0)">And for the record...I don't drink no mofo, crackerdine, jank-bucket, peckerwood wine.</span><br /></span></strong></em></div><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/18812696-113157432416983704?l=deacondictionary.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Deacon Dr. Freshhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03957541832557299790noreply@blogger.com0